I think it is hardly contentious to stress the importance of early diagnosis of dementia. There has recently been a call for the need to pick up early signs of a faltering memory from all shades of the professional and political spectrum. Any observer might conclude early diagnosis would lead to a positive outcome and the condition would no longer create human misery. If only that were the case.
I am going to share some personal experiences to elaborate the advantages of early diagnosis. When you live with someone on a day to day basis you often miss subtle changes in their behaviour. In the early days I am sure I considered tiredness or stress were behind M’s poor memory and hoped it was a temporary phase in her life. When she began to lose things and her cognitive capacity continued to diminish I began to become concerned.
We all have times when life feels just too complicated and everything seems to go wrong. However, when M started to lose prescriptions and medication on a regular basis and no longer seemed able to comprehend how to use the remote control for the TV my concerns began to grow. I have to confess at this stage of things my reaction was far from helpful. Communication also became difficult as M never seemed to be able to make her mind up about anything and misunderstandings arose with greater frequency than they ever had before in our relationship. Then I mistakenly chose the wrong path: misreading the signals I chose the safe option in suggestions about a diagnosis of M’s condition.
My initial thoughts were that M was becoming more assertive with a belief that she was always right in her judgement. When the alternatives were suggested that she was either exhibiting the ‘Right Woman Syndrome’ or early onset dementia: I chose the safety of the former. I reckoned it might be easier to accept that my wife was becoming assertive, sometimes unreasonable, rather than exhibiting the symptoms of early onset dementia. When I raised the changes in her personality with others I hit a steam roller of denial and accusations about my own mental state.
The initial reactions to my concerns about changes in M’s personality were met with disbelief and denial. In retrospect it is easy to see how others were taken in by a highly intelligent person’s ability to conceal the changes that were taking place in her cognitive ability. Some regarded me as the problem and Marriage Guidance Counselling as the solution to problems in our relationship. Others said that they were not seeing what I was seeing or they simply did not want to get involved. My story here is familiar to anyone who has perused the literature on dementia. It is also possible that I was also in denial and my attempts to gain an early diagnosis were ‘half baked’.
The sad thing about all this is that earlier diagnosis would have made no difference to M’s treatment: there is no treatment for vascular dementia. Yes I remember that the debate continues about mixed dementia. The simple fact remains we would still have been left to find our own way on our journey with dementia. However a couple of things could have resulted from an earlier diagnosis: empathy from family members rather than misunderstanding and we would all have progressed further on our learning curve on our journey with dementia.
Stroke led to M’s diagnosis of dementia: significant distress could have been avoided with an earlier diagnosis.
