It now 12.30 and M is still in bed.  Unfortunately, I may have chosen the wrong words this morning when I said: ‘ the Carer is here and I have to go for physio’.  M’s immediate response was: ‘I don’t need a carer I have been by myself this morning when you went to work’.  The problem was compounded by not being able to say a familiar face was here.

If I had the ability to turn the clock back things could have been rather different.  I could have left M in bed and gone for physio.  She would either have been in bed on my return or getting to know the new carer.  The outcome of my poorly chosen words is that I had to cancel my physio appointment and M is still in bed.  In addition, she has not had this morning’s blood pressure medication.

Things have been going well lately and complacency has crept into my performance.  With a little forethought I would have been building on the positive atmosphere that has been created in the last few days.  Words and facial expressions are critical when you are caring for someone with vascular dementia.  But hey ho it is possible that M will expect breakfast when I encourage her to get up.  There are no set times for meals with this condition.

Some suggest ‘going with the flow’ as the approach when trying to deal with dementia: I much prefer the acronym  GIGO.  My performance this morning has been GARBAGE (in) it is not surprising I am getting GARBAGE (out) in return.  Perhaps ‘Fail to Plan: Plan to Fail’ is a more subtle way of expressing the way to deal with this vicious condition.