Starting from today; Monday’s blog will become a reflection on the previous seven days. It will be a sort of progress report for professional staff to comment, if they are able, on how things are going.

On Tuesday Sue our social worker called for a routine home visit.  She concluded that our current care arrangements are not working for us, and certain changes are in the pipeline.  The ‘Plan’ is to make ‘sits’ a part of Maureen’s recovery programme, and move them away from ‘baby sitting’.  Sue has forwarded a draft Support Plan which I am about to comment on.

On Wednesday I met with Paul my Counsellor.  Once again he alerted me to the fact that Maureen’s world is shrinking, and the need to minimise distress.  He also encouraged me to develop a life of my own, and not be totally consumed by my caring role.

Twice this week I have cajoled Maureen well outside her comfort zone:  a trip to Lidl on Thursday, and to Freeman Street Market on Saturday.  On both occasions she has seemed lost in unfamiliar surroundings.   All such outings are doing is reminding her of her poor memory, and causing distress.  I intend to avoid such outings for a while, and stay local.  There have been several times this week when Maureen has got lost in the house: struggling to find her way from one area to another .

Maureen’s presentation continues to fluctuate throughout the day.  Sometimes I am her rock and she couldn’t cope without me, at others I am the enemy within.  Yesterday evening was a prime example of my changing staus: after having fun dancing and singing to music whilst washing up she has ‘rested her eyes on the sofa’.  I  woke her gently at 10.30 pm, and she was reluctant to come to bed.  She mentioned that she ‘couldn’t go very far as I had taken her car’- it has been on the drive all day.

An hour later Maureen made her way upstairs.  She made it clearthat she wanted a bedroom to herself and will sort it out in the morning. As she preapred for sleep she is going on about all of her things being taken and never knowing where her car has gone. I retired to the spare room after a brief spell beside her in bed.

I find it difficult to sleep when hostility has surfaced  late at night.  My sleep pattern is poor at the moment with early morning wakening.  Despite acupuncture on Wednesday the pain in the rotator cuff in my left shoulder seems to be getting worse.  My legs are far from comfortable, with pain from tendons in both of my quads.  Therefore,I need to make the Leisure Centre to walk in water.

Our regular carers have been back on duty this week.  I managed to have a chat with Chloe on Friday, and she reports that Maureen is becoming increasingly confused.  She also says that Maureen is no longer concerned about her appearance, and is reluctant to shower.  We also discussed my forthcoming birthday, and how any change of scenery would only add to Maureen’s levels of confusion.  Chloe mentioned that Maureen resents my absence when I visit family, and feels that she would think I had left her if I was away from home for any length of time.  Looks like the celebration of my three score year and ten at the end of February will take place in Cleethorpes – Portugal is a pipe dream!

In closing I think it is worth outlining a few targets for the week:

1. To try to ensure all medication is taken.
2. To encourage Maureen to exercise four time a week, as recommended
3. To try one new evening activity to replace watching T V.
4. To leave the car on the drive unless Maureen is in it.
5. To meditate every day.
6. To visit the Leisure Centre twice (me).
7. To follow the exercise regime for my shoulder.
8. To try to build more fun into our lives.