Maureen was totally exhausted yesterday afternoon.  When I looked back on what had happened in the morning I think I worked out why.  Maureen was still in bed when Chloe arrived so she immedaitely joined her and sat on the beside  chatting.  This was still going on when I left to go to the Leisure Centre.

When I returned Maureen looked lovely after a morning’s pampering.  Once Chloe had gone it became clear that Maureen had been exhausted by the morning.  She had not been left to ‘come round’ in her own time.  Then I imagine she would have had breakfast to be followed by a shower and having her hair done.  The chatter and banter would have been non-stop.  No wonder there was a look of relief on her face when she signed Chloe’s timesheet and bade her farewell.  Maureen’s immediate reaction was to seek refuge on the sofa, and I left her to it while I prepared lunch.  She joined me in the kitchen after a while and laid the table in a fashion.

Maureen always enjoys our Friday luch of home cooked fish and chips. She ate well and  was allowed sweet – an old joke from both of our chidhoods.  Then she took to the sofa and slept for a considerable period of time.

In the evening ‘Paul the Pot’ took over, and in retropsect put Maureen under significant pressure.  Following a late evening walk we popped in to see some neighbours and stayed chatting for half an hour or so.  When we returned home Maureen revealed how challenging our visit had been for her.  It had confronted her with how stroke had damaged her memory, and left her very frightened.  Maureen had no recollection of being in Hayley and Abb’s house before.  Although she enjoyed their company one of her comments during our chat with them was telling: following stroke ‘she thought she was going mad but realised she had lost her memory once’.

Unfortunatley, I fell asleep on the sofa shortly after returning home. When I woke up I was ‘lashed with resentment’:  that I am always talking to other people but don’t talk to Maureen.  In retrospect Maureen was ‘letting me have it’ for subjecting her to a very challenging situation, because I wanted to socialise.  Popping in to see neighbours late at night is the last thing you need when you are recovering from stroke!

I hope I have learned my lesson from the events of yesterday.  It is important to encourage Maureen to spread her energy over the day.  This is easier to do when I am at the helm: providing I remember Maureen is recovering from stroke!  It must be so difficult for paid carers to know how to work with Maureen, as she is keen to do things,.  What we all need do to is help Maureen to pace herself and spread her energy out over the day. Something that ‘Paul the Pot’ needs to keep to the forefront of his plans both day and night!