Maureen was feeling very sorry for herself last night.  She became so upset that I encouraged her to go to bed at 8 ‘o’clock.  I had inadvertently brought about a spell of self-pity with my choice of music on YouTube.  Playing our Songbird reminded Maureen that two of her children had died.  She was almost inconsolable as she sobbed: ”Why me; have I been a bad person?’  I did my best to console her and assure her that she was not responsible for Kevin, and Denise dying far too young: her son at 4 months, and her daughter in her 50’s.

I have never heard Maureen go in for self-pity in the time we have been together.  She also said something along the lines of: ‘I meet a nice man and now I have got trouble with my leg’.  A reference to trouble with her left leg following stroke.

As she slept I  thought about a couple of things.  I just wonder if I can cajole Maureen into a trip to Coventry?  I deliberately put Maeve on YouTube to try to motivate Maureen to contact Denise’s daughter.  It doesn’t appear that communication is going to come from Coventry or that long promised visit.  I am trying to ‘nurse’ Maureen into a trip to Coventry.  At the right moment it might just evolve: just like Nottingham.   The other matter concerns the possibility of therapy about unresolved grief.

Any type of therapy is alien to Maureen:  with a predispositon for ‘flight’ she has always buried bad news.  Her solution is to scarper when things get too hot for her.  This is her approach to dementia with denial presented as: ‘I lost my memory once’.  Unfotunately, there’s no hiding place from. dementia..

I think it is worth seeing if we can create opportunities for Maureen to talk about all sorts of things.   I think I met  the woman for this job yesterday morning.