It’s 5 am in the morning and I have been awake for an hour.  The events of the last hour have set my mind racing, and sleep is impossible.  Perhaps this ‘rude awkening’ was meant to be: it has clarified my thinking over next weekend.

Maureen returned from a bathroom break feeling cold.  She put the light on to recover a blanket that had slipped off the bed.  Then she left the bedroom, and everything went quiet until I heard her call my name. I found her downstairs, in the dark, saying that she was: ‘lost and couldn’t find her way back to bed’.  As often happens she is now fast asleep, and I am left awake with my thoughts.

This morning is a stark reminder of her presentation.  One constant is the unpredictable nature of her mixed dementia. On occasions  Maureen can present being in complete control of her faculties.  At other times she is overtaken with abject confusion, and ensuing distress.  It is therefore not safe to leave her to her own devices for anything other than very short periods of time.

My rude awkening confirms what is needed for next weekend, when I will be visting relatives: round the clock care in our home.  Anything else would be nothing short of a negligent approach to her welfare.