I’m in it now, as they say, up to my neck. Having the audacity to have a few days respite has given Maureen the opportunity to open up another front on my behaviour as a husband: ‘why did I desert her in her hour of need?’  This theme recurred several times during Saturday and has been followed by behaviour that has once again woken me up early this morning. .

None of this has been helped by the uncoordinated efforts of her sons which have misfired and added to Maureen’s confusion.   However, as I said yesterday ‘It’s A No Brainer’ I need to focus on my responses to Maureen’s presentation.  It is fortunate that I have been able to call upon support from the Home Treatment Team and we are expecting them mid-morning.

The risks of Carer Burnout are well documented and I can feel exhaustion coming on after two days back in the mix: supporting Mrs Dementia is her current mode is unsustainable.   I’m finding it really difficult to adjust to being her husband during the day and a dangerous man at night.  I had been warned that this would happen as dementia progressed because of her past experience of an abusive relationship.  

I’m hoping that some changes in our routine along with additional carer support might help me to ensure my own well-being and  be able to support Maureen to remain in her own home a while longer.