Today is our 17th Wedding Anniversary – an important event in itself.  We don’t normally do anything exceptional to celebrate, so we will probably have a quiet night in.  As the ‘in house chef’ it is my responsibility to create dishes suitable for the occasion.  It is also the day when I am meeting our social worker to progress my Carers Assessment.  That is where the other woman in the photograph: my mum comes in.  I need to go to visit her as soon as possible.

Mum is 94 now and lives in a Care Home in Coventry.  She is rather forgetful and has vascualr dementia.  If I don’t get to see her soon she may forget who I am.  It is likely that she will deny I have been to see her within half an hour of my departure.  However, just to be able to take her out for a short ride around local country lanes is all she asks. She remains so grateful for such small pleasures.  If she behaves, I might even take her to her favourite Country Park and treat her to an ice cream.

The meeting with the social worker is opportune after the events of this week.  It is now time to draw a line on Maureen wandering or being left to her own devices.  We have had more than our share of good fortrune on that front: chancing our luck any further is not an option. This raises the thorny issues of independence and deprivation of liberty.  These mattres have to be dealt with sensitively, as it is vital for us all to recognise the sterling efforts Maureen makes day after day in the face of adversity.

I chose well 17 years ago and it is until ‘death do us part’ as we continue on our journey with dementia.