I have taken a couple of risks here this morning and on both occasions the outcome has been positive.  Early on  I received a call from our Care Agency that our normal carer was not in work and they were struggling to find a replacement.  As they were unable  guarantee a familiar face, as C’s replacement, I told them we would cope by ourselves.  There would have been little point in sending someone who didn’t know the ropes here and M’s response may well have been to refuse to get out of bed for a stranger.

This meant that I had to hurriedly change my plans to meet my Admiral Nurse as I couldn’t risk leaving M alone for a couple of hours: I made do with a chat on the phone.  It also created an opportunity for us to regain control of our own house: no longer invaded by carers and me scooting off.  So the happily married couple had their house to themselves this morning and things have gone well.  It raises the question about the need for flexibility within Care Plans but I recognise the difficulties with such arrangements.

Early in the afternoon I took another risk by watching Bargain Hunt on the T V and leaving M to her own devices in the kitchen and garden.  I kept my ears finely tuned to have an idea that she was still on task.  It is likely that I ‘bobbed off’, as they say around here, for a moment or two during the one o clock news.  When I came too all was quiet and M had scarpered.

After asking a couple of neighbours if they had seen her, I jumped in the car to widen my search.  Sure enough I soon came across her on a familiar route a couple of streets away.  With minimal encouragement she joined me  in the car and returned home, saying she didn’t know where I had gone.

Some would concentrate on the dangers of my risky behaviour and perhaps I have had couple of lucky break today.  However, no harm has been done and all is well without the involvement of carers or police.  Just another day in the life of caring when dementia is the elephant in the room.  Once you have had one day with dementia; you have had one day with dementia.