My wife is an articulate very intelligent woman.  She has had a stroke that has led to vascular damage leading to difficulties with her short term memory.  Some say she has mixed dementia and I think that is where I would put my money.  The stroke robbed her of 50% of peripheral vision.  Anyone who sees her at a good moment would not believe she has suffered long term damage from stroke.  Her resilience in the face of adversity is remarkable.

Her husband became rather tired in the last few days and sought additional support from Social Services.  Unfortunately, they have little understanding of the impact of dementia within a household.  They also fail to understand that my wife tires easily: energy is eaten away as she tries to process information.  Their intervention led her to believe that is has all become too much for me and I no longer have the capacity to look after her.  Unfortunately, it gets worse than that.

In my absence they asked her if: ‘she was happy’.   As she has come round after her ordeal, and it has taken her a couple of days in bed, she is put things into perspective.  She has said this morning that they keep trying to prove that she is depressed.  I think she has a point and i know where it is coming from.  They are trying to apply a model makes no sense with dementia: the medical model.

All of this reminds me of John Lennon.  When asked at school what he wanted to be when he grew up his short written answer was: ‘to be happy’.  His teachers said he didn’t understand the question he said: ‘you don’t understand the answer’.

I would say two things: lots of people who have been infecting our lives do not understand dementia.  They also fail to understand the limitations of the medical model and it’s outcome for mood.  Antidepressants are no better than a sugar coated pill for mild to moderate depression.  You should know that by now if you followed my Link in an earlier post on this Blog.

Just in case you missed it I will post the link again: Irving Kirsch