M mentioned again last night that the police are always monitoring her movements.  She said that the black car outside our house follows her around.  When she walks out on her own, plain clothes police are on every corner to keep an eye on her.  This might sound a little far fetched but it all makes a sort of sense when I look back over the events of the last few months.

On two occasions I have sought police involvement because M has gone missing.  Their initial involvement coincided with her walking back towards our house, after being missing for over an hour. A couple of weeks later they found her several streets away attempting to find her way back home.  So I now think that M believes that the police are always on the look out for her when she is out by herself.

M’s memory is so poor that she does not know her way around here and  has to ask  people how to get back home.  Her vision is limited following stroke and she is virtually blind on her left hand side.  Therefore, there is a very fine line to be drawn between her liberty and safety: it is a matter of judgement.  In my opinion the cost of limiting her liberty is considerable and it is worth taking measured risks by giving her space to wander.

The police have been exceptional in their support to us: prompt and professional.  In some ways I wish they had M under constant surveillance – it would make my life easier.  The only thing I can do at the moment to ease M’s anxieties is ask that neighbour of mine to get his girlfriend to park her ‘Black Maria’  a bit further down the road.  The ‘police’ need to know that I have things under control for most of the time.  They can go off duty now and again and leave us to it.  Then M will not be constantly looking out of the window to see if they are still watching her.  Police surveillance has now gone over the to as far as M is concerned and it is really worrying her.  No wonder she is packing to go home every night: she wants to get away from all this nonsense.  Home of course is a place where dementia played no part in her life!